Of Feeding Birds, Tongues and Home
by avengingfreak
Summary: Steve, Tony and Thor are bored. Not a good thing. The end of their boredom started out with one simple question and they ended up feeding birds...or did they?


I don't know exactly how this came to me, I just sat down, started to write and this was the outcome.

Just a silly, friendly one-shot. Hope it's not too silly. And you can tell me what you think about that, you know :D

I own completely nothing.

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"Thor, where are you going?"

Steve, Thor and Tony were gathered in the Stark Tower's living room trying to kill time by some late night action movie. Tony and Steve rested casually on each sides of the couch while Thor was pacing alongside the windows not even stealing a glance at a huge plasma TV. The pacing was getting on Tony's nerves but after the fifth try of talking Thor out of it he gave up. Besides he couldn't blame the guy. Tony would never admit it but he was actually bored to death. They all were. For past five days they had absolutely nothing to do. Five whole days! No missions, no parties, no interviews, no conferences. Plus no Bruce, which meant no experiments, no Clint, which meant no snorts and chuckles and other scary noises, no Natasha which meant no guns and no poker faces and finally no Fury, which meant no danger to earth, which meant no work, which brought them back to no missions. It was driving them crazy.

It was when the pacing had changed into a brief walk that Steve asked that question with slight surprise.

"Feed the birds." Thor rumbled his answer already on his way out of room. Steve's eyebrows rose up in way bigger surprise now. He frowned and looked angrily at Tony. "What did you tell him this time?" Steve quickly stood up and made his way over to Thor.

"Me? Really? Why does it always have to be me? Couldn't he for example meet a nice old woman who told him that feeding birds calms down a restless mind?" Tony yelled after Steve while trying to get on his feet. "Jarvis, switch off the TV. This is gonna be way better than watching choppers getting blown up." He commanded and rushed after his two teammates.

"Why do you want to go feed birds, Thor?" Steve knew it was a stupid question but he just didn't know how else to start.

"It calms down a restless mind." Thor answered simply. Steve rolled his eyes. "Idiot," he whispered.

"You mean to offend me?" Thor looked at him dangerously. He seemed almost hopeful to get into a fight and Steve really didn't need an angry Thor on his hands. They've been sparring the whole afternoon together just to make themselves busy and Thor seemed to get more aggressive the more he got bored and Steve's had enough of bruises for today.

"No, I don't mean to offend you, Thor. I was talking about Tony. He's the only person I mean to offend right now. Manipulative piece of iron!"

"Hey! Words can hurt you know! But I think that has been the best insult you've ever come up with, probably the only one actually. Our fearless soldier's tongue finally froze out from 1940's and actually managed to catch up with the right usage of awesome, brutal, sadist modern 2012 language. I'm so proud of you!" Tony appeared from behind the corner with his arms opened as if he wanted to hug Steve. "I'd hug you but then I would have to demand a not-so-reasonable price from you for hugging world's most loved and adored billionaire cuz I don't do Free Hugs." Both Steve and Thor looked at him questioningly. "That means no, I won't hug you." Tony explained.

"This mortal's tongue never ceases to amaze me." Thor stated while looking at Tony astonished.

"Ugh, guys? Can we talk about something else than tongues? Like I don't know, feeding birds maybe?" Steve really just wanted to get to the point and get over with this nonsense. Things were never easy with Stark though…not even mentioning Thor.

"See, captain, here's the thing." Tony pointed a finger at him, that annoying smile of his never leaving his lips. "If you just let us lead a conversation – a very intellectual conversation, I emphasize – this big royal teddy bear would actually forget about the whole feedy birdy situation and what more! He wouldn't even notice that the elevator is like ten minutes up already." Having that been said, Thor pushed the button to open the door of the elevator.

"You could just tell him to go feed the birds and it would take less time than talking about tongues!" Steve snapped. He didn't let Thor step into the elevator though. "Thor, wait! You're not even allowed to go out by yourself! You know how it always ends." Fury made himself very clear in that matter and well…everyone else agreed that it was for the best. People tended to have very strange reactions when meeting Thor.

"Nobody will tell me what to do! I will do as I want, whether you like it or not!" And with that Thor stepped in the elevator.

"Ok then, I'll go with you. The movie wasn't much entertaining and I have nothing else to do anyway. And you master are coming with us." Steve grabbed Tony by the t-shirt and dragged him into the elevator.

"But I need to d-" And with that door closed behind them.

It must be quite a sight, Steve thought. Seeing three famous superheroes sitting on a branch in park at Monday night, doing nothing. They were doing nothing because when they finally made it to the park they realized they didn't have any food to feed the birds with. So they just sat there, silently watching the birds. Well, Steve was watching the birds…Thor was staring at a night sky and Tony looked like he was competing with a pigeon in a staring match.

"I don't like birds." Tony suddenly stated.

"Don't say that to Hawkeye." Steve blurted out and Tony chuckled.

"I didn't know you had it in you to make a joke."

"There are lots of things you don't know about me, Tony."

"Why?" Thor suddenly asked while still looking up at the night sky. Steve frowned in confusion. "Why what?"

"Why do you not like birds, Man of Iron?" Thor's voice sounded even deeper than normally and it somehow made the question sound more significant, as if it held a deeper meaning. Tony didn't even try to take his eyes off the pigeon.

"They can fly and they can get wherever they want." It was Thor's turn now to frown in confusion. "So can you."

"And they destroy everything." Tony added as if it explained everything.

"I like them." Thor mused.

"No wonder. I've just said a complete description of you." Tony knew it was harsh but he just couldn't help himself. Fortunately Thor either didn't seem to care or he simply didn't show it .

"In Asgard we have birds too. They might be the only things that connect Asgard to this realm. They even look exactly the same although we have more kinds of them in Asgard." Thor's eyes concentrated on one only star, his home.

"Do you miss it? Asgard?" Steve couldn't help but ask. He sure missed his world. But it wasn't actual world he missed. He missed the old music, men being gentlemen, his friends, his family, his Peggy. World has come through many changes while he had been frozen that man just couldn't say it was the same world. But it was at least same planet.

"I enjoy my time here on Earth and it may sound ruthless but I don't miss Asgard too gravely. Asgard has changed since my banishment. It's not the same warming place it used to be. But it is still my home." Thor's gaze turned hazy for a moment. You could almost see images of his childhood passing in front of his eyes.

"Well if Asgard is your home than Earth could be your hideout. You can come here whenever your parents spank you or banish you or whatever parents on Asgard do to punish their children. Stark Tower would be your sparring kingdom because sparring room is place where you break things and tell you what, you tend to do that in my tower quite often. Just don't take any birds with you. I'm not sure if the building would be able to withstand five minutes with all of you being in there." Tony sensed a chick flick moment rising up nearby and he just needed to cut it by saying chick flick things himself and then quickly putting it to death, it was his own personal tactic. But it still made his heart warm up a bit when he heard Thor's thunderous laugh and Steve's quiet giggle.

It was kind of funny that throughout whole conversation they have not even once looked at each other and it felt somehow right. None of them would ever admit it but they actually enjoyed each other's company on their little feeding trip. It was moments like this that made their friendship stronger. One man lost in a world, second one lost in a time and the third one lost in himself. Of course they had their own differences but looking at them now, sleeping peacefully on a branch with heads rested on each other's shoulders, you could tell they understood each other perfectly.

Something sticky fell onto Tony's forehead. He blinked once, twice and slowly opened his eyes. He reached out his hand to touch his forehead and…..

"AAAAAH! Ew! Gross! Get it off me!" Tony was immediately on his feet shaking his head like a maniac. He heard flapping of wings nearby so he looked around himself. There on the street lamp was sitting a pigeon he had a staring contest with last night. Tony pointed a finger at it and in murderous tone said: "I'll get you for this you _throwin'-shits-on-foreigners'-heads_ wingy little bastard!"

The pigeon made a victorious sound, flipped his wings and flew away.


End file.
